I live my life around a schedule. I know what time I should wake up. What time I should be ready for work, what time I should be at work – call my boyfriend, etc. etc. I like living in this clockwork type of world. It helps me feel that my day is productive when everything in my “checklist” is done. It is necessary for me to live in this order because I have a very chaotic thought life and this sense of order brings me some form of peace and orderliness.
However, there are things that happen that are beyond my control. Things like traffic, unexpected interruptions and intermissions in life that irks me. I get agitated when it happens. I feel that my world has turned topsy turvy and that everything for the day is ruined all because something or someone is late or something doesn’t come in time. My patience is limited only up to a certain time frame and even the grace period I allow myself is stringent. I guess, when my internal timer ticks off and things do not happen on time, that is where I stress a lot.
So, for the past year, I have been extremely stressed out. Not only has my schedule been totally changed, but the things I have expected in my life never arrived on time – and has not arrived at all. I am still playing the waiting game on things in my life and the stress had made me depressed, anxious, agitated and I had felt hopeless just because I couldn’t get what I want in MY TIME.
But what I have learned from this experience is that HE wanted me to learn the meaning of TRUE PATIENCE. He allows me intermissions and interruptions in my clockwork life to shake me up and to deliver a message. He provides Interruptions and Intermissions to EMPHASIZE, ELABORATE, EXPLAIN and provide a good backdrop for the blessings that will come my way. He provides it in the same purpose that an Ad or Centerfold is placed right smack in the middle of a wonderful article to make it more memorable. God also makes sure that this interruption or intermission is relevant to shaping your character in the future.
God is good. He gives us things to ponder on while we wait for the perfection of his blessing that will come not in my time but in HIS PERFECT TIME. God wants to teach us that sometimes, you need a change of pace in order to shake off the habits that you have gotten in a time of complacency and redundancy. He shakes us up and gives us a new challenge to get to everytime.
My challenge is to change myself and completely transform myself from someone who couldn’t do anything because of my depression and clinging to the past glories t0 someone who will take the bull by the horns and tackle the make-over that GOD wants to make of me. He has given me the direction I need to go in my intermission in life. He has shown me the path to it. He has given me his challenge. Now, it’s my turn to keep up with him and organize, change and turn over my whole self to HIM.