Posted in idiosyncrasies

Lunch with Ignoramus Unlimited

(( Please be reminded that these are my personal rantings and should be taken with a grain of salt- or if not available, soy or wasabi. ))
Today, our company treated us to an expensive lunch at Tanabe, one of the finer Japanese restaurants in our area. Normally, I would be thrilled,but since this morning I have been in the foulest of foul mood that anyone that would cross me would be stabbed literally with a letter opener in the face. The reason, Office Politics. But I’ll get to that later.
Lunch was supposed to be my refuge. My time of solace. My own little time to recuperate from the hell of idiotdom but not today. I had a company lunch to attend to. At the very least, we were having Japanese food. Yum. However, I knew that the sanctity of my Zaru Soba Sushi Bento would be totally ruined by idiots and ignoramus around me.
The restaurant was wonderful. I have been there one too many times, but I still love it. The cute tatami rooms, the big long table that the company reserves for us, a special nook for us to enjoy our meal. We got there and they were noisy- Louder, more annoying  than most people in the restaurant.
I had to mutter my sentiments in Japanese.
“URUSAI.”
But I kept my mouth shut. I wanted to stay quiet at least to calm myself down, lest I use my chopsticks to stab them seriously in the eyes or scream.
The food came. To my left, Ignoramus #1 got his Sukiyaki. It was a metal bowl of perfection, and he stared at it. The people around him more knowledgeable told him to mix the raw egg with the soup. He stared at it and then declared loudly.
“It’s pig’s food.”
I wanted to slit his throat.
He gave it to his friend next to him and laughed at it loudly.  I wanted to stab him so bad. I held on to my cellular phone like a life buoy. I didn’t want to get a felony in my last month at work.
My food came. Cold Zaru Soba noodles, perfect somen sauce, maki sushi and some sweet agemono. I smiled, probably the first smile I had today. Someone to my right reacted.
“What is that?”

I answered. “Buckwheat noodles in cold somen sauce. It’s good you should try it.”

“It’s not even cooked, plus it looks like pigeon’s poo.”

“Don’t be an ignoramus.” I shot back and glared.

People shut up. They knew I was annoyed.

First, it was rude to talk about someone’s food like that before they eat. Second, it was generally unexpected from someone like him who I thought was well learned and smart. Third, he was being an asshole and he knew it. I held on to my chopsticks and bowl defiantly and ate to avoid cussing him from head down.

I cooled down a little after my wonderful meal. ( That was probably the only highlight of my day.) And I even gave some of my agemono and maki to non-idiots around me.

I watched the server panic as they tried to effectly serve our party of 25 swiftly.  I knew from experience how challenging that is and so I was nice and called her properly by name, smiled at her and thanked her as she tried to serve us.
But, I almost screamed when Princess Ignoramus started complaining about the service. Sure she missed a few things, but do understand that Donna was not a robot. SHe was doing her best in the circumstances she was in and working hard to serve you. you do not have to bitch at her for skipping you. You only have to ask her politely, if she had missed you. If she forgot your order, remind her kindly. Bitching at her is totally out of the question. It’s not like she’s messing it up on purpose in the first place.
I smiled at Donna sympathetically when she handed me my 2nd glass of green tea.

Then, Ignoramus #1 pushed away his cold somen. “This tastes like raw fish guts. This meal is PHP380.00 we could have had 6 piece Chicken Joy with this.”

“If you wanted to eat chicken, then you should have said so in the first place. Don’t go insulting people’s cuisine like that.” I finally said.

People really show their personalities best in times like these and sometimes, I cannot believe how crude people in the office are.
I am glad that I’ll be gone from here in a month. I just dont want to deal with idiots anymore.

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Author:

A 30 something fangirl, writer, artist and dreamer, a princess by day and ninja by night who believes in magic, true love and wants to change the world one brush stroke at a time. Marikit is a self-taught artist learning more about art and the world around her.

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